Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
This is a little piece that I will call a "transition story arc." Mike, the editor, will call it a rant. The saving grace, in my mind, is that I often couldn't care less what Mike thinks. So, it evens out.
Our friends at Webster's online define truism as:
Adjective: an undoubted or self-evident truth; especially: one too obvious for mention
Note to our fun-loving college kids who are perfectly happy with being "C" students:
When doing research papers after 17-thousand shots of Jameson, you'll be happy to know that the brain trust at Wikipedia label Truism as a NOUN.
I suppose I shall name my next pet "Truism" and then do a shot. Feels like college all over again!
I know a gentleman who uttered something that truly offended today. In the interest of protecting his identity, we will call him Steve...primarily because his real name is Stephen. Granted, it's quite hard to offend me but Stephen, I mean, Steve did.
An important scad of background on this guy includes the following:
- He's a genuinely kind individual
- He's been through a volatile relationship, which is on the mend
- The relationship turned south due to his significant other abusing alcohol
- He's a homosexual
He, I and two other mutual friends were sitting in front of a restaurant where they work, waiting to go on a quick grocery store outing, when he dispersed several epithets toward a young woman with whom he works. Granted, SHE couldn't hear his foolish words from the car, but he needlessly uttered them anyway.
By all accounts, these two get along at work, they work well together and there's zero animosity between them. She's also well liked around the neighborhood and seems to be a kind soul. Steve just felt it appropriate to repeatedly call her "fatty" behind her back.
I've written a great deal of inappropriate humor, sometimes at the expense of others. But my regular readers know that I NEVER poke fun at Hispanics, they seem to be able to handle that all on their own. If you don't believe me, visit a Latino bar sometime. Plus, I'm having new sheet rock hung next week and I don't want to piss them off.
I also don't tell "fatty" jokes...primarily because there's not enough room on a typical laptop screen. And I don't poke fun at or perpetuate stereotypes toward young African American men...because I don't want to get shot and/or carjacked.
Aaahh HA! See where I'm going with this? I'm not a bleeding heart left-winger, primarily because I don't want to anger Sean Hannity. I DO, however, judge those who arbitrarily judge books and covers. I've read lots of books and peeked past many covers. If you don't make this a regular life routine, try it sometime...you might be pleasantly surprised.
With all silliness aside, I wondered how in the world that a 50-year old gay man, who grew up in a society steeped in judgemental attitudes toward HIS lifestyle could possibly lob such comments toward a person who I know to be a hard working, sweet and caring individual.
So, I called on my good friend, and Pontchartrain Press' chief story research manager, Eric for some background studies on hurtful words and their implications upon society.
Eric does good work but, sometimes when sending his findings back to me, goes off in unrelated directions. I eventually tend to get the info I need...and some info that is, decidedly, not needed.
Jim: I'm doing a quick piece on a 50-year old gay man who works with a very nice young woman. Not realizing that I am also friends with her, he repeatedly called her "fatty" behind her back. I waited to call him out when we were one on one, but I want to write about this. Any research you can find that would help the story along would be great!
Eric: Is this one of those SAT math word problems?
Jim: Can you please do some research before I book a flight to Philly and kill you?
Eric: There was a study a few years ago about the MOST offensive words in the English language.
As it turns out, the top four (in order from most to least) were:
Jim: Thanks for your help. See ya' soon
Eric: I was surprised that F*ck wasn't on the list but even MORE shocked that FAT was number one!
Think about this...every girl thinks she's fat...even if she isn't. Call a girl fat and she'll stab you in the balls.
At any rate, it explains why my old band, "The Fat Nigg*r Nazi Cun*s" never made it big.
Jim: Interesting. I'm gonna get back to writing. Thanks again for the research.
Eric: Unrelated, but I f*cked two girls named Ginger this week. They may not have souls, but they got PLENTY of DNA.
Jim: Are you clinically insane?
Eric: Perhaps. The one Ginger was a blast. She liked to be abused and verbally degraded. I let off 20-years of pent up aggression on her and she has been begging for more ever since. She's such a filthy whore...and she's not fat. I think I'm in love.
Well, I can always count on Eric to provide more than enough background research on a story. Plus, our communications remind me precisely why I do not accept dating advice from him.
So as not to cast a stone from my own glass house, yes, I have slung unfair, judgemental commentary toward and about others...and I feel absolutely horrible about it...with the exception of everything I've said or written about the band Nickelback. Simply dreadful music.
People will always make fun of, ridicule and degrade other people...as a society, they always have and, likely, always will. Just watch an episode of The Voice or Chef Gordon Ramsay.
As for myself, I'm having a nice dinner with the young woman in question right now while looking across the table, keeping a hurtful secret about her co-worker. I'm also, oddly, wondering what having crazy sexual escapades with TWO Gingers in one week must feel like...but I'm not about to text Eric again for the answer.
With that said...I like to lob more educated insults toward those who deserve it:
Webster's Online Dictionary
dick; (dik) noun; Slang for detective
Adjective: derogatory term for penis
Noun; Shortened name for Richard
Noun; Glen Beck, Bill O'Reilly, Jim's boss, Al Gore
Real world: a label for a narrow minded asshole who should be ashamed of himself. (that one came from the Jim Patrick dictionary)
copyright Pontchartrain Press 2013