We temporarily disabled the email icon from our main blog before shooting it into outer space where I can now report that it destroyed a North Korean satellite. USA!
In the meantime we glanced through a pile of stupid mail for recreational purposes-- Sort of like a sexual encounter with an ex, only without awkward feelings of regret the following day; enjoy...
I'm, somehow, NEVER amazed by emails or blog site content that random readers feel strongly about sharing with us while we're doing important things, such as lying very still...and now, we share them with you...sort of like herpes.
From Susan, Louisville KY
Hey, I learned Mandarin Chinese over the winter. Yaaaay for me Jim Patrick!
From: Jim Patrick
Congrats! I only know one Chinese phrase...
"I'll take the number 15 dinner." Godzirrra! Wait, that's Japanese.
Pretty impressive though, huh?
Elsewhere, apparently, since Donald Trump was elected, a large segment of the American populace plan on moving to Canada. Not me-- I'm much too lazy to take such a drastic stand about anything, especially where packing tape is involved. Plus I'm scared of moose and Celine Dion.
At any rate, I'll just change my Facebook "currently lives in" status to Ottawa. Problem solved.
From Jason, Decatur, IL
celebrating my one year anniversary with the bestest girlfriend ever at Coldstone Creamery.
From Jim Patrick
I'm happy for you both and I just threw up a little bit in my mouth-- That's very hipster of you. I'm actually trying to develop a cool "hipster" bar concept, sort of a cool hang without having to admit that it's a cool hang. Our signature drink will be called "My bad, you're dead."
The drink is a mixture of Rolling Rock and Tide Pods.
By the way, please lose my email address.
From Shauna, Ocracoke, NC
Dear Jim,
Do you feel the Bern???
From Jim Patrick
Not since the amoxicillin kicked in.
From Alex, Nashville, TN
Just took my kids to Chuck E. Cheese. You should hang out there one afternoon. You'd get tons of writing material.
From Jim Patrick
Yes, I'd Love to look like a pedophile. Actually, the founder of Chuck E. Cheese is brilliant for creating an environment where one might take their kids AND get a DUI on the way home.
That's about it for the mail sack for now...
By the way, the name of my new "hipster" bar-- The Downtrodden Scampi."
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